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Saturday, June 17, 2006

"look at the stars and know somewhere you are dreaming of me too"

So the other night I tried sleeping with my clothes on like I do a lot of the time, for some reason I thought that this time I would make me feel closer to you, but I guess I was wrong. For this time I got really bad cuts in my hips from that new belt, and that hoodie kept getting trapped around my neck. This was the first time this ever happened so I took it as a sign. I changed into my soft pink pajamas and layed awake for most the night. Maybe if someone were to read this I would come off to strong. But in real life I come off to soft. im just that loopy ass bitch who cant balance for shit. And that same bitch who is mean to everyone but behind it is love, but still loves to crack smart ass remarks and say stupid dirty things. If people I ever knew read this, my life would end. I only want to let one person know me like this, but I haven't found that person yet. I can dream and think of who I want that person to be, but I know that the person I want it to be is off limits. This is hard living two lives, like a secrete agent. The other day I broke down and started crying, but since I was raised as crying is a sign f weakness I stopped, and was told to stfu. My life may be easy, but after a while little things build up, and then they hit you like a ton of bricks, of feathers. So I know who I want to be my one confidant, but I know it wont happen, so to anyone in this world, when you look up at those stars who do you see? Who do you hope yours will be? If it is someone you know it will never be, realize it, but don't forget them, because they have got you through this so far and will until you find your one person. So to you, I know you are there, you might not be reading this but that doesn't matter. When you look at those stars and you feel someone looking back, that is me, don't be scared, jut appreciate it, and smile, because god knows I love that smile.

1 Comments:

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12:25 AM  

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